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Have you ever noticed that the hardest times to pray are often when we need to do so the most? Amidst rising doubts, nagging hurts and busy schedules we too easily lose the will to come to God in prayer.

There could be several reasons for this tendency. Sometimes prayer is undesirable because it forces us to face pain in our lives from which we would rather escape. Approaching God in honest prayer requires time and persistence that we at times feel unable to give. There are times where our hearts are so full of doubt that it is hard to imagine what good prayer would do. Self-reliance often convinces us to put our heads down and charge through difficulties on our own, without regard for God.

Martin Luther used to spend ah hour each morning in prayer. One particularly busy morning his assistant suggested that maybe they should shorten their time of prayer for the day. Luther replied that because they were so busy that day they should pray for three hours instead. Often what we need to do the most is what we feel least inclined to do. Rather than pushing us away from God doubts and pains should stimulate a renewed drive to spend time with him in prayer.

Sometimes we avoid prayer because we want to stay mad about our life situation. Lifting our hearts to God in prayer would suggest that we are ready to let go of our anger and this is not always the case. Yet, it is in coming to God through honest prayer where we reach our turning points.

Picture Asaph in Psalms 73. He has looked around him and observed a troubling scene. Those who don’t love God are making plenty of money and leading apparently happy lives while those who try to live for God don’t seem to derive any special benefit. Asaph becomes so bothered by what he finds that he is tempted to slip away from what he believes. The turning point emerges when Asaph enters God’s house, despite his inclinations to run in the opposite direction. In God’s presence he rediscovers the truth that turns his situation away around.

During a recent weekend I found myself quite frustrated with my circumstances. Prayer was the farthest thing from my mind. When I finally gave in and expressed myself to God in prayer, the cloud over my heart began to lift so that I could enjoy the moment again. I later recognized that the turning point came when I prayed, expressing my frustration to God.

Let’s learn from Asaph that when we are most tempted not to pray is when we need to do so the most. No matter how we may feel about it, moving toward God in prayer can change us and open our hearts to the turning points that he desires to bring to our situations.

Hi! My name is Jamie and I am a 26 year old Christian young professional looking for a part time nannying/babysitting job! Currently I am working for a University Monday-Friday 8-4:30 and I am looking to meet a family or two that needs childcare around my work hours. I have 15 years of experience with kids. I started out babysitting when I was 11 years old, I worked at a daycare for 4 years, and I have worked as a lifeguard and swim instructor for 7 years. I have also volunteered in Kid’s Ministry at a couple churches I have attended.

I love working with kids and I am told that I am really good at it. I love to have fun with them watch them learn and grow. I love getting to know their little personalities and habits. I am comfortable and have experience with all ages (birth-middle school).

I’m very active, energetic, positive, and I love to be outdoors. I hold certifications from the American Red Cross in CPR, First Aid, Lifeguard Training, and Water Safety Instruction. So I am able to teach swim lessons if you have a pool!

I have a great driving record, comfortable with having a background check, and I can provide excellent references.

Please contact me if you are interested!

Thank you!

-Jamie
JamieB.Wilk@gmail.com
603-540-5336

The Sunday after the earthquake hit in Haiti, our church was introduced to John Compere. John is from Haiti and has attended Flood for the past several years. As a church, we were able to financially support John as he returned to Haiti to care for his family and nation. Below is an email update I just received. Thank you for your generosity!

Pastor Adam

In a recent interview with Relevant Magazine, author Don Miller said that the three things that lead to a happy life are good relationships, a fulfilling line of work, and finding meaning for our pain. While all three of these are challenging to reach, it is often the matter of learning how to find meaning in our pain that eludes us. No matter how well things might be going for us, we find it hard to understand or accept the deep hurts that have shaken our lives.

What are we to do about the pain that seems to be for no apparent reason? If we had made serious mistakes leading to our suffering, we could at least learn from them and look forward to better results in the future. When pain comes into our lives through no apparent fault of our own it can seem arbitrary, random and meaningless. Why me? Is God playing some kind of joke on me? What did I do to deserve this?

Asking these questions assumes a basic lesson that we learned in childhood. There is a cause for every effect. If you touch something hot you will get burnt. The longer we live, however, the more we begin to face hurts without such clear causes. We grasp in the dark for some sort of meaning and long just to know why this had to happen. I believe that it is these moments of our deepest pain that we find more reason than ever to doubt God’s goodness.

Several years ago some of my closest friends turned against me in a most unexpected manner. Struggling to find reasons or resolution, I spiraled into a period of the deepest emotional pain I had ever experienced. The circumstances seemed too unlikely and ironic to be real. For one of the first times in my life I felt like I could no longer trust that God meant it all for my good. Doubts sprung up within my heart from the soil of wounds that seemed to have no real purpose.

The biblical character Job could relate to us in these moments of inexplicable hurt. Here’s a man who had lived his life for God and experienced great blessing. After losing everything, he sat down in broken health and tried to figure out what on earth had just happened to him. The friends who came to comfort him insisted that he simply must have done something wrong to deserve all this. There was no other explanation in their minds.

When God finally speaks with Job, he shows that although good and bad often come to us as a result of our actions, there are many things in life that simply cannot be explained by this narrow theory of retribution. There was a bigger reason for Job’s suffering that God never explained to him. Rather, he reminded Job and his friends of the wisdom by which he sustains the world and this was enough to bring Job back to a place of trust. We learn from Job that there is an element of mystery to God’s work in our lives and that we cannot expect to have all the answers about why things happen.

After a year of struggling to believe in God’s goodness, I finally decided that whether or not I would ever understand why God had allowed such pain in my life, I was going to trust that he meant what had transpired for my good. This marked a turning point for me where deep pain turned to new opportunities and apparent loss brought great gain. Doubt began to fade away not because I had all the answers but because God had reminded me that he was trustworthy and I could place my life in his hands.

May we learn from Job how to move from a place of inexplicable and doubt-causing pain, back to a place of trust in God’s goodness. It is when communicating with God through prayer, even in the midst of our doubts, that he can help us to find meaning for our pain.

$725  per month. All utilities, including high speed cable included

Single Christian man seeking a Christian male roomate to share home in a desirable neighborhood in Allied Gardens. Perfect location and close to freeways.  Available March 8, 2010

* Single family home with three bedrooms is well maintained and close to all. North side of interstate 8 one exit west of college avenue. (SDSU)

* Ride your bike to SDSU.

* Bedroom is very nicely furnished. Queen Bed with newer mattress, dresser and computer desk and library table.

* Beautiful modern kitchen with everything you need to cook. Have your own pantry space for food.

* Beautiful yard with waterfall and deck.

* Utilities are included. Included gas, electric, water, high speed cable, and Washer and Dryer.  

* Feel at home and welcome. “Mi casa es tu casa.”

* Park in Driveway

Applications presently being considered. References necessary.

Leave message for Jim at 619-286-8827. All calls will be returned as quickly as possible.

Have you ever gotten lost while driving somewhere? I know the feeling well. Knuckles clenched against the steering wheel; back hunched; eyes scanning the road, looking for that street after the second 7-11 on the right hand side after the stop sign without the crosswalk. It never takes long for doubt to creep into the consciousness, questioning whether we copied the directions correctly from Google Maps or heard the right street name over the phone. The doubt comes even easier when you’ve received the directions from a stranger (because what do they know?). But what happens when you reach that point of doubt with someone close? Someone you trust. Not with directions to a birthday party or a friends house but with a piece of advice, or a probing question.

Have you ever doubted the intentions of a friend’s actions? Have you ever second guessed the love of a brother, sister, mom or dad? Have you ever questioned the provision, faithfulness, or acceptance of God?

Unless you’re new to this thing called life, you know that doubt is a natural part of it. That’s because as humans we have limits, and all of us, in one painful way or another, have experienced those limits firsthand. We’ve experienced the pain of rejection, the pangs of disappointment; coming up short or being let down. And as individuals interested in the least amount of struggle and hardship possible, doubt becomes the first of many warning signs that things aren’t going the way they should – that perhaps difficulty lies ahead.

But God wants us to acknowledge our doubts, our fears, our disappointments, and our frustrations. He wants us to honestly confess where we’ve been hurt and perhaps the faulty mindsets that led us to that place to begin with. He wants us to get to end of ourselves to discover that He’s still going, and going, and going. That unlike us He has no limits and that He loves us limitlessly.

When we doubt, we in fact acknowledge what is true, and the truth is that we will fail if we trust ourselves. But as the Psalmist declares, when we get to that truth, we can joyfully declare,”Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

- Jeremiah Kim
jeremiah.h.kim@gmail.com

I used to think that it was wrong to admit doubt. If it is impossible to please God without faith, as Hebrews 11:6 says, wouldn’t it displease him if I let him know that I struggle with doubt? Then I met a man named Habakkuk.

This prophet in Old Testament Israel encountered a personal dilemma not unlike that of Asaph in Psalms 73. After repeatedly calling out to God to do something about the violence and injustice in his society, it seemed that nothing ever changed. Perhaps God didn’t even care about what was happening around him? Although Habakkuk had dedicated his life to promoting spiritual change in his society, it seemed like God was not doing his part (Habakkuk 1:2-4).

I appreciate Habakkuk’s honest writing because I can relate to how he felt. There are times where it feels like I have done everything I can and God is just not pulling his weight. Why doesn’t he move? Why doesn’t he respond to the needs that have been placed before him? When life is not turning out as hoped, can he see and understand what that is like?

If Habakkuk, a spokesman for God, had these questions and was unafraid to admit them, and if God saw fit to include this writing in the Scriptures, isn’t it possible that doubt-producing questions are a natural part of our Christian experience? Perhaps God is waiting for us to ask about that which troubles us the most.

God’s initial answer to Habakkuk was not what he had hoped to hear (Habakkuk 1:5-11). Not only was God quite aware of the violence and injustice in Israel, he was already in the process of sending Babylonian invaders as punishment upon the nation. Although he had hoped that God would do something, this was not Habakkuk had in mind. It seemed ironic that the God who was too pure to even look at evil, could send people as awful as the Babylonians to punish those who were better than them (Habakkuk 1:12-17).

There are things that happen in our world that seem too hard to understand. Where is justice when a beautiful and caring girl like Chelsea King goes missing during an afternoon jog? Why did a massive earthquake have to devastate Haiti by striking at the place where it was most vulnerable? While Haiti continues to grieve and the world looks for ways to aid recovery, why did at least another 700 people have to die and 2 million be displaced by a massive earthquake in Chile?

Habakkuk’s story can encourage us to share our doubts with God in prayer. He also demonstrate the heart attitude that we need to bring to God with our complaints. When the prophet has asked his difficult questions, he says, “I will stand at my watch and station myself on the ramparts; I will look to see what he will say to me, and what answer I am to give to this complaint” (Habakkuk 2:1).

Habakkuk trusts that God will answer his doubts and quiets himself so that he can listen for God’s reply. The picture of him climbing up the city walls and gazing out from where watchmen kept an eye out for the city, is meant to give us the sense of one who looks expectantly for God’s answer.

Bringing our doubts to God, we can trust that in his time he will answer the questions that he sees fit and give us grace for that which remains mysterious. Rather than hiding from our doubts or trying to ignore them, let’s bring them to his attention and look for his answers.

Andy Johnson

Hi future roommate! I just moved into a 2 Bedroom apartment and now its time for a roommate (FEMALE ONLY). Room available March 1st (Yes, in the next 12 hours) and you can move in ASAP.
About the apartment: The apartment is in a well-managed and quiet complex with 2 pools, 2 hot tubs (bonus!) and a gym. It’s a 2 Bedroom/2 Bath corner unit located on the 3rd floor with a balcony. There is tons of parking (both covered and uncovered). Your room is unfurnished but the rest of the house is completely furnished and equip with all kitchen utensils, and appliances. Your room has one large window and mirrored closed doors. Your bathroom is across the hall and will be shared with guests.

Location: The apartment is located in the beautiful La Jolla shores area. Conveniently located near the 5, 52, and 805 freeways. Also, close to UCSD and easy access to the UCSD buses. Washer and dryer are located nearby in unit 1. Like to cook? Trader Joes, Whole Foods and Ralphs are right down the street! There are a few shopping centers in the area and the mall is also nearby.
About me: 26 year old female. I am very active and enjoy surfing, working out, running, biking, laying poolside and swimming. I also love reality TV, cooking, music, nights out with friends and anything outdoors. I’m really laid back and easy to get along with and I hope you are too!
About you: I’m looking for a female roommate who is responsible (must pay rent on time), respectful and fun! Looking for either a student or professional who is equally as active but doesn’t bring the party home each night. Non-smoker. No pets.

Details: Rent is $711 a month plus utilities, which is usually around $65 and that includes cable, internet, trash and SDG&E. Deposit is $225 and must be paid upon move-in. The lease is for 6 months and afterwards we’ll go from there on a month-to-month basis. Room available March 1st.

Think you are the right fit? Please contact me at 11socalkk@gmail.com.

Well it was a fun FIESTA night at Rob Bautista’s house last night (2/27) for TJO team’s first quarterly prayer night of 2010.  After learning a little about the orphanage and the kids, we read over some of their prayer requests for January and February.  It was great to see so many new faces at Fiesta Night and to pray together as a group for a good hour.  Afterward, Robert’s roommate Cesar cooked up some delicious food!  Chicken & steak tacos, pinto beans, yummy rice, chips & salsa, and Maiko & Lily’s homemade brownies and cheesecake.  To top it off, we ended the night with Dave Gladson dressed in an authentic Mexican sombrero playing a mini-accordion bought at the TJ/USA border.  Rob attempted to accompany him as a singer. Let’s just say it was the BEST and the WORST mariachi band ever!

Here are a couple prayer requests from the night. To see more prayer requests or learn more about TJO, email orphanage@diveintoflood.com or find us under Flood Church Mexico Impact Teams on Facebook. You can read prayer requests and submit your own under the Discussion tab on FB.

  —Luis: Please repair the road and for my friends.
  —Byboh: We don’t want any theft here.
  —Rodrigo: For all my family and the whole world.
  —Moises: I’d like to ask to take care for my dad and mom.
  —Salvador: Pray for my family and friends. That I could find good friends in school.
  —Antonio: That Casa Hogar is taken care of and pray for it and all of us.

 We also want to pray for Bertha, a staff member at the orphanage, who is no longer in touch with three of her children due to a past of drug abuse. Although she is now recovered from her addictions, she is still suffering the painful consequences of losing contact with 3 children. She requested prayer for their health and safety, as well as for the safety of El Faro orphanage. We as a team also want to lift up Bertha’s life so that she can experience God’s grace, goodness, peace, and redemption in her life.

I read through the Psalms a few years ago for my summer reading material. To mix things up a bit, I read it in a different version than I was used to studying. So, with this Lent project, I pulled out the particular Bible I read them in, as I tend to be one who marks things up a bit, and wondered if I had any good insights back then that might help me now. I get the honor of being the last person to write on Psalm 88 after Matt preached on Sunday and there has been a stream of insightful writers all week with just those 18 verses as the springboard. Yipee.

The word I had written at the start of the psalm is honesty. Psalm 88 is someone bringing their honest heart before God. Personally, I have a tendency to focus on the positive side of things. I like to sweep the negative and the ugly under the carpet and keep it hidden. I look on the bright side; I look for the silver lining. So, with regard to my heart before God, I sometimes skip over a few parts – not lying exactly, just selective truth telling.

There are, however, a few times in my life when no such selection has been available. Like the psalmist, I have experienced times when I have had nothing left to bring to God but raw, honest truth. The toll of surviving the day took out of me what little I had to make myself look good.

In hindsight, as I look at the times of darkness in my life, I am tempted to focus on the good God brought from difficulty – and it would be true. God has brought good from the treachery of my life. However, for me, the importance is not the silver lining, but the fact that God takes me in whatever condition I might find myself. He does not flinch. He does not falter. He does not need me to give him or anyone else some fake spiritual platitude that somehow makes him look good in the midst of my pain.

So, what is your honest truth today? You may find yourself in the same place as the psalmist – a place of pain with no resolve, no silver lining. Or, you may find yourself in a place of great rejoicing, having had trouble following the last week of the blog as we have lingered in Psalm 88. Perhaps you are flat-lined right now – not in pain or despair or joy, but not alive, either. Maybe you are experiencing God in ways that are deeper and truer than ever before.

Bring it.

Bring your honest truth before God. There is no need to spin it around to show the good side or package it nicely with a big bow or selectively edit, as I might be tempted to. Simply bring your honest heart before God and he will take you.

I’m standing my ground, God, shouting for help, at my prayers every morning, on my knees each daybreak. Psalm 88:13

Rebecca Koo